Life in a box : Funda Ek : Planning & Prioritization

Disclaimer : All characters in "Life in a box" are fictional. But any resemblance to actual places, incidents, situations, persons may be intentional :-).

"I hate my work", Vini said while throwing her purse at the sofa. "Such a bad day, i didn't get a chance to take a break for even 5 minutes today. I am telling you, they are killing us."

I smiled. Its fun to imagine the role reversal that has happened in our life. My new box is cool and Vini's really hectic. I come back everyday at five, make tea for both of us and relax in front of TV watching "Everybody loves Raymond" while she struggles to come back by seven and prepare dinner for us. Atleast that is the story since i left my old box... where we never stopped working for them.

"You know what happened today", She started her day's story by sipping the tea. This is the daily routine now and i love it. Three months of life apart was really horrible. Nobody to talk once at home and she wants to give me up to date news, everyday as soon as it happens.

"I am being swamped at work. My plate is always full. There is always so much to do and worst there is no shortage of new work. I hate it, how you used to manage da, I am sick of it. I think i will quit."

I smiled. I can sense a session of fundas by Aneeshji coming up. The very ones which have helped me live my life peacefully, at least to an extend, in my old box. But let me better be sure that she needs it before i start lecturing it on her. She after all is not just another men-tee, she is my wife. The difference i have learned the hard way. None of the other men-tee's shout back when i go overboard with my fundas.

"Today i was in three production issues. And i am given more work. If i go to my manager saying i am loaded, he will say plan and prioritize. All the work doesn't have to be done now itself. Arrey, after all i have to do all the work right? I am tired, you tell me how should i handle that. How should i say NO to work? I don't want to work like this. Will i get a job in your company, I also want to relax like you do."

Well, is she meaning i have no work? Grrrrrrrrrrr... In my words i have "less" work. How less, well, i don't need to tell you folks. We are not discussing about me remember. She is in for a session today, i don't think, i can avoid it today. Vini, this is your lucky (or unlucky!!!) day. I am gonna open the doors to one of the most important lessons to survive in the box, especially when there is no shortage of work. Funda Number Ek (one) : Planning & Prioritizing.

"Vini, relax di, the situation is nothing bad, what he told is right. You just need to plan and prioritize properly. You should be able to get control of the situation which you are in."

"Oh, you also criticize me. Its all my fault right. Not that people giving us work are wrong, its all our fault." I told you right, wife is different from a regular men-tee, i am yet to fully learn that. I get carried away all the time. But sorry dear, you are gonna get the full session, i have already started. May be a lighter language might help, my brain told me.

"No i am not saying that dear, look at me. When you go to your manager, forget him, suppose i am the lead, if you come to me saying you are loaded with work, you can't take up something i have assigned you, i will ask you one question. -- WHY? "

"I know, he does the same. I just can't take it up ok. Why i should be killed with work or what? Don't smile as if i don't know anything."

"Don't get emotional da, there is no need or use for that in our profession. If you know the question WHY will be asked, don't get upset. Just have the answer to it with you. Have the data to back up WHY you can't do. Very important to bring data to the table while discussing anything. Without data, its just argument. You provide the same arguments with DATA to back it, you can see how much more of an impact it has."

"But how can i show that i can't take this work. All the other work are in different phases. I can never prove i can or cannot do this work. It is not so simple as you say."

"Well, before we close ourself saying we cannot take this work, lets analyse for a moment what are the work you have and whether you can take this work or not."

"Anhaaaaaaaa, now u r going to convince me to do it, rather than supporting me."

Did i mention about the wife factor yet??? "Not like that dear, hear me first. Have you heard about Stephen R. Covey and his book The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People."

"Nope". "In that book he describes a habit called Put First Things First. In that he describes a framework in concentrating on the long term important goals instead of doing things which appear to be urgent but are really less important. He explains it using a 2x2 matrix - using a cartesian co-ordinate system with urgent non-urgent in one axis and important non-important in another. Learn this dear, this is your holy bible for Time Management."
"QI - we don't have a choice. It has to be done. QII is the part i love. Here the tasks are not urgent yet, but they are slowing on the path to move to QI. Finishing them before reaching QI is the challenge and the trick. The success of our planning depends on it. QIII - not important not urgent. We shouldn't be doing this one unless 2 conditions - No other work :-) or you feel it is gonna be QIV pretty soon. QIV - the more no of tasks there ,the higher the level of failure in your planning. Never let a task migrate from QIII to QIV. Never be forced to do less important stuff just because it is urgent, when ideally you should spend that time focussing on long term important tasks in QII."

"This stuff looks interesting, but you didn't tell me how it will help in reducing my work. I need a magic for that. DATA as you say to back my decision to say NO."

"Patience my dear Vinikutty, Every day morning, you fill this matrix with your tasks. Ideally it should have more in QII and QIII and less in QI and QIV. Attack the tasks so that you will reach a position where your goals are long term. When every new work comes, religiously put it in this matrix. When you new task comes, you will be in a position to say, what impact it will have when you accept it. Whether it will cause some tasks to move from QII to QI or QIII to QIV or whether it will affect any QI or QIV tasks which would be deadly. That my lady love is the DATA you are looking for."

Finally i could see a small reflection of smile in her face. I could sense that she has suppressed her wife feelings to throw it at my face because she can and has accepted it as a good learning to implement it in her work.

I think this is the right time to say it, i have been waiting to say this from the time she came, let me say it before it is too late. "Honey, i am hungry :-) Can you make dinner now." Yeah fundas are over and husband aneesh is back. I watch her with a smile as she rolls her eyes in "oh my god, this guy!!!!!" expression and walks to the kitchen. I switched on the TV and Sanjaya Malakar was singing his guts out. Back to the normal life, outside the box........!!!!!!!!!

A Journey to the Smokies : On our Second Anniversary

April 10... Second anniversary is coming, need to plan something special for Vini. This thought was in my mind for some days. "The idea for a perfect gift : Give something which he/she wants to do for a long time, but wont do it them self". I don't know remember from where i heard this, but it sure is a great way to arrive at a good gift.

A romantic get away :-) Yep i liked that one best from my list. She always wanted to get away for a weekend, to stay in a resort and be pampered. So this anniversary is gonna be that weekend. Just needed to decide the place and resort. Eight Gables Inn, Gatlinburg in Smoky Mountains was the place to be.. where we are gonna celebrate our second anniversary.

We were really surprised to realise that this was the first trip in US where it is going to be just the two of us. Let me make it more interesting, I gave her one more gift. I promised her i will be less of a control freak, less of a hyper active person for the whole weekend. No maps with spots which we need to visit, no yelling at her to get ready at the exact time, no intention of doing every single thing i have planned for the trip - when nothing is planned :-) that risk is avoided.

So with just the map of the way to Eight Gables Inn, we started at around 11am Friday, April 6. It was a beautiful drive. Driving through Carolina and Tennessee. On the drive through I-40 W the spring was too beautiful and tempting. "Lets stop and take some photos". "What" the control freak inside me yelled. We never stop till we reach our destination, thats me :-). But not today. We stopped at 3-4 times on our way, we were taking photos in front of someone's home, back yard, being barked at by their dogs. It was real fun. It sure made Vini happy. "I can't even believe this is my husband".

In between Google maps confused us. We roamed around 30 min trying to find the way to Gatlinburg as soon as we entered Tennessee. After finding out the right way by calling the resort, we thought we will have lunch. We had decided we are going to have lunch from some American restaurant only, no fast food or desi hotel. And we got one too. "The Bean Trees", on Tennessee border in I-40W was just the place. It was started by 4 women and now 2 of the founding ladies continued to run it. The sign board inside the restaurant said "Bad Food, Slow Service, Great Place". I don't agree to the first, but the next 2 statements were right :-). We played Dominoes and had great food. It was really refreshing.

Eight Gables Inn, Bread & Breakfast was all that we were hoping for and more. Amazing room with fireplace, feathertop beds and a bathroom equipped with whirlpool tubs. Our suite was called "The Morning Glory". After checking in, we went to Gatlinburg downtown and shopped for sometime. While walking through the town, we couldn't skip the "Old Times Photo" stores. We checked it out and this was an experience which was hard to resist. We had a blast shooting those photos. Vini just loved holding those guns and of course the fact that she was aiming at me. Even the photographer commented "Look at how happy she is to shoot at you!!". "Its just two years, i can't imagine what she will do after some more". This sure was the highlight of our trip.

We retired to our room at night where our desserts where waiting. After slipping on our robes we spent some time relaxing in the whirlpool tub. This sure was turning out to be worth the money we spent.

We went to see the Great Smoky Mountains National Park in spring, to see all the trees blossoming. But it had other plans. It snowed so heavily on Friday night and Saturday, we could hardly get to Dining room for Saturday, April 8, morning breakfast. We were greeted with a hot cup of coffee/tea and then by a hearty breakfast. It sure cleared Vini's impression that Americans eat only cornflakes for breakfast.

After that it was massage time. It was our first experience but surely will not be the last. It was really relaxing and an amazing experience. Eric and Marcel, of course lady for me and guy for Vini, had magic in their hands. The board in which we could write comments were filled with one like "Eric, will you marry me","You guys are awesome" :-).

Saturday night, we had our candle light romantic dinner. We don't know whether we had a "romantic" dinner or not. We were our usual self :-) chatting away of all the stupid things like we do when we are alone. We hope were not a disturbance for the other couple, on their honeymoon, having a "romantic" dinner :-). After the four course dinner, we ordered our champagne to the room. Yeah!!! I know the people who know us are raising their eye brows. Champagne and us :-). Well it was in the package, and we sure didn't want to miss it. I opened it and spraying it all over. I always wanted to do that!!! We tasted it and as i expected hated it :-). Sorry champagne lovers, i don't think we are not fit for the champagne rather than otherwise.

Sunday morning, we went to Clingman's dome in Smoky Mountain National Park. It was an amazing drive, with mountains fully covered with snow. We stopped in between for a trail down to the river, for playing in the snow and ice. Once we reached the Clingman's dome after a tiring 2 mile hike in the cold, we called it a day for our trip :-). It was time for start our journey back.

On our way back, relaxed me was making all the mistakes i usually don't. Not driving carefully, forgetting wallet in the car while going out, forgetting to take the credit card after paying. "What is happening to You?" "Well, you wanted me relaxed, non hyper. This is that Aneesh". "Enough of that gift, please come back to your normal behavior". Yeah, at that moment we realised vacation is over :-) and its time to get back to our normal life.

Before we checked out of the Inn, we were writing our memories into the guest book in our room. I browsed through it and a couple of entries were hard to forget. One was written by a couple who had just lost their young son. "It is the first time we are alone after our great loss. This place has given us an atmosphere where we can grieve our son without any disturbance. Thanks for all the help in getting us back to normal." Another one was "We are celebrating our 55th wedding anniversary. Thanks for making it really special."......
55 years :-) well 2 over, 53 to go.... we can sure give it a try...

Some more fotos....